diandrahollman (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
diandrahollman) wrote2011-07-28 10:37 pm
diandrahollman) wrote2011-07-28 10:37 pm
Entry tags:
Another Life - Part 12
Another Life
by Diandra Hollman
E-Mail: diandrahollman@yahoo.com
Date Finished: ? I'm working on it.
Rating: a mild R for this part. (suggestive dialogue and hanky panky, but still nothing scandalous yet. Sorry)
Keywords: slash, Jack/Sawyer, Alt!Verse
Spoilers: Nothing really detailed or time specific. This just lives in the sideways verse of season 6. Sort of (see author's note).
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. I'm not really sure anyone *technically* owns them anymore but Darlton blah blah Bad Robot blah ABC blee blee don't sue.
Dedication: To![[info]](https://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif)
ellel for inspiring me to write this story. And to the cast and creative team behind one of the best damn shows ever televised. You will be missed.
Author's note: Much as I loved the finale and thought it was totally appropriate this story will henceforth assume that Daniel's "let's detonate a hydrogen bomb" plan worked and follow my crackpot version of quantum suicide theory. In other words, when the bomb went off, our characters were split into two different universes. One where the bomb didn't go off, and one where it did. Both universes are very real and neither is purgatory.
Previous entries
*************
Three days later
Miles was flipping through television stations when Jack slipped into the room.
“Can I talk to you?”
Miles looked startled, but recovered quickly, turning off the TV. “Uh, yeah, sure.”
“I can come back later...” Jack started to slip back into the hall, ready to declare this attempted visit a mistake.
“No, it’s okay. Is something wrong?”
“No.” Jack stepped hesitantly closer. “No, I just...I wanted to talk to you about your partner.”
Miles groaned. “What did he do this time?”
“He didn’t...” Jack rubbed his forehead. He wasn’t really sure why he had felt a sudden need to talk to Miles, but he thought maybe the man could help him gain a little control over the situation somehow – some understanding of just what he was getting himself into. “Did he say anything about what happened last weekend?”
“You mean the night he slept on your couch after you passed out in the hospital? He told me about it when he stopped by on Saturday.”
“That’s all he said?” Jack wasn’t sure if he should consider that a good sign or a bad one.
Miles was silent for a moment, seeming to read Jack. Then he gestured to the chair beside his bed. “Have a seat, Dr. Shephard.”
Jack opened his mouth to protest – apologize for wasting his patient’s time and make some sort of graceful exit. But all that came out was “Jack.”
Miles’ expression didn’t change. “Jack,” he amended.
Jack sat in the plastic chair beside the bed.
“What else happened?”
Jack sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. ‘Might as well tell him everything.’ “He spent the night on Saturday too. And he spent part of it in my bed.”
Miles’ eyes widened. “Wait...you slept with Jim?”
“Nothing happened.” Jack sighed. “We both had nightmares that shook us up pretty badly...I thought maybe we would sleep better if we weren’t alone. It was stupid, really.”
Miles looked skeptical. “You *just* slept?”
“I kissed him. But he pushed me away. He said he wanted to slow down.” He looked up at Miles, who seemed to have been struck dumb, and cleared his throat. “This morning when I finished up in surgery I found a cup of coffee sitting on my desk. I know it was him because he left a note saying he remembered the sugar this time...”
“Woah, wait. Slow down...”
“We have a date on Friday.”
Miles massaged his temples and sighed. “Okay. One thing at a time. *You* kissed *him*? Not the other way around?”
Jack nodded.
“Why?”
Jack frowned. “Why?”
“You must’ve had a reason, right?”
Jack’s mouth opened and closed a few times silently.
“Look. Jim is very good at manipulating people into doing what he wants *and* making them think it was their idea all along. He would have made a good con artist. A week ago you were avoiding him and now you’re inviting him into your bed and making plans for a date. What changed?”
Jack blew out a breath and leaned back in the chair. “You think he’s manipulating me?”
“I didn’t say that. I’m just wondering why the sudden change of heart.”
Jack studied the floor for a minute before answering. “Because I’m tired of fighting,” he finally said. “I’ve been finding excuses not to date for years. I’m too busy. I can’t find the right woman. I have to take care of my son. But since I met Ford, I can’t stop thinking about him. I can’t stop *dreaming* about him. I know the dreams aren’t always good, but...it’s like I’m being *drawn* to him. Like we’re *supposed* to be together. Does that make sense?”
Miles just stared at him, his expression blank. “Are you gay?”
“No,” Jack answered instinctively. Then he flinched. “Yes...I don’t know.”
Miles waved his hand dismissively. “Never mind. Scratch that. Are you attracted to Jim?”
This answer Jack was confident about. “Yes.”
“But you don’t trust him. Is that why you’re here talking to me?”
Jack shifted a little in his seat. “Something like that.”
“You want me to vouch for his character.”
Jack stilled. “Yes.”
Miles nodded and tried to sit up a little, push himself up the mattress. He gave up quickly when the efforts made his back twinge painfully.
Jack caught his wince and sat up straighter. “Do you need help?”
Miles waved his hand again. “No, I’m fine. Just getting a little stir crazy I guess.” He leveled his gaze at Jack. “Let me tell you something about Jim. He can be a real asshole sometimes. Drive you absolutely fucking insane until you just want to punch him in the face. But I wouldn’t trust anyone else to have my back. In fact, I probably wouldn’t be here recovering from a gunshot wound if he hadn’t been busy reading the suspect his rights when that other guy got the drop on me.”
“Okay.” Jack frowned, not quite sure how to take that.
“He reminds me of a dog my uncle used to have when I was a kid. We always had to be careful when he was around strangers because he would growl and sometimes try to bite them. One day I realized he only did it *because* they were strangers. Once he got to know them – once they *earned* his trust – he was the same big marshmallow he was around my family. It was his way of protecting us.”
“So I’m the stranger?”
“No. You *were*. See, Ford tends to keep people at arm’s length. And he usually does that by acting like an ass and pissing them off enough that they don’t want to get any closer. But if he trusts you, he can be the most loyal friend you could ever have. He already trusts you. I’m not sure what that makes you, but I know Ford. If he’s taking care of your son and bringing you coffee just for the hell of it and climbing into bed with you *just* to sleep, you are well past earning his trust.”
Jack leaned back in the chair, rubbing at the day’s growth of stubble on his chin. “So what should I do?”
“What are you asking me for? It’s none of my business.”
“I mean...what am I getting myself into here?”
Miles leveled him with an incredulous stare. “Do you always overthink things like this?”
Jack frowned.
“Look, if you don’t want to come out of the closet, that’s fine, but it sounds like you’re at least curious. What’s the worst that could happen?” His face slackened, humor fading with realization as Jack practically flinched at that and stared at the floor. “If you’re afraid Jim will do something to hurt you or humiliate you or something; don’t be. Even if it doesn’t work out between you, he’s not the kind of guy who would sabotage you out of spite. In fact, if somebody else did something to hurt you he would make it his personal mission to track them down and make them pay for it. He can be very...vigilante.”
Jack still looked unconvinced.
“Y’know, someone once told me that all relationships involve some sort of risk – at least in the beginning. You can’t avoid it. And you can’t go through life worrying about what *might* happen. So the question here isn’t whether or not you *should* - the question is: what do you *want*? If you’re not ready, you’re not ready. But if you are, you just need to stop overanalyzing everything and go for it. Call it a leap of faith.”
Jack thought about that for a minute. Was he overthinking it all – worrying unnecessarily? Juliet had complained more than once about his tendency to get “too intense” about certain aspects of his life.
‘Let it go, Jack,’ he heard his father’s voice whisper in his head.
He opened his mouth, not entirely sure what he wanted to say, but was interrupted when the door to the room opened.
“Excuse me, I didn’t realize you had a follow up today,” the surprised physical therapist said, beginning to retreat back into the hallway. “I can come back later.”
“No, it’s okay. We were just finishing up.” Jack stood, quickly falling back into professional mode. “I’ll see you again next week, Mr. Straume?”
Miles gave him an odd look, but followed his lead easily. “Yeah, sure. Thanks, Dr. Shephard.”
Jack smiled and nodded, slipping past the therapist. “He’s all yours, Doctor.”
TBC
by Diandra Hollman
E-Mail: diandrahollman@yahoo.com
Date Finished: ? I'm working on it.
Rating: a mild R for this part. (suggestive dialogue and hanky panky, but still nothing scandalous yet. Sorry)
Keywords: slash, Jack/Sawyer, Alt!Verse
Spoilers: Nothing really detailed or time specific. This just lives in the sideways verse of season 6. Sort of (see author's note).
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. I'm not really sure anyone *technically* owns them anymore but Darlton blah blah Bad Robot blah ABC blee blee don't sue.
Dedication: To
ellel for inspiring me to write this story. And to the cast and creative team behind one of the best damn shows ever televised. You will be missed. Author's note: Much as I loved the finale and thought it was totally appropriate this story will henceforth assume that Daniel's "let's detonate a hydrogen bomb" plan worked and follow my crackpot version of quantum suicide theory. In other words, when the bomb went off, our characters were split into two different universes. One where the bomb didn't go off, and one where it did. Both universes are very real and neither is purgatory.
Previous entries
*************
Three days later
Miles was flipping through television stations when Jack slipped into the room.
“Can I talk to you?”
Miles looked startled, but recovered quickly, turning off the TV. “Uh, yeah, sure.”
“I can come back later...” Jack started to slip back into the hall, ready to declare this attempted visit a mistake.
“No, it’s okay. Is something wrong?”
“No.” Jack stepped hesitantly closer. “No, I just...I wanted to talk to you about your partner.”
Miles groaned. “What did he do this time?”
“He didn’t...” Jack rubbed his forehead. He wasn’t really sure why he had felt a sudden need to talk to Miles, but he thought maybe the man could help him gain a little control over the situation somehow – some understanding of just what he was getting himself into. “Did he say anything about what happened last weekend?”
“You mean the night he slept on your couch after you passed out in the hospital? He told me about it when he stopped by on Saturday.”
“That’s all he said?” Jack wasn’t sure if he should consider that a good sign or a bad one.
Miles was silent for a moment, seeming to read Jack. Then he gestured to the chair beside his bed. “Have a seat, Dr. Shephard.”
Jack opened his mouth to protest – apologize for wasting his patient’s time and make some sort of graceful exit. But all that came out was “Jack.”
Miles’ expression didn’t change. “Jack,” he amended.
Jack sat in the plastic chair beside the bed.
“What else happened?”
Jack sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. ‘Might as well tell him everything.’ “He spent the night on Saturday too. And he spent part of it in my bed.”
Miles’ eyes widened. “Wait...you slept with Jim?”
“Nothing happened.” Jack sighed. “We both had nightmares that shook us up pretty badly...I thought maybe we would sleep better if we weren’t alone. It was stupid, really.”
Miles looked skeptical. “You *just* slept?”
“I kissed him. But he pushed me away. He said he wanted to slow down.” He looked up at Miles, who seemed to have been struck dumb, and cleared his throat. “This morning when I finished up in surgery I found a cup of coffee sitting on my desk. I know it was him because he left a note saying he remembered the sugar this time...”
“Woah, wait. Slow down...”
“We have a date on Friday.”
Miles massaged his temples and sighed. “Okay. One thing at a time. *You* kissed *him*? Not the other way around?”
Jack nodded.
“Why?”
Jack frowned. “Why?”
“You must’ve had a reason, right?”
Jack’s mouth opened and closed a few times silently.
“Look. Jim is very good at manipulating people into doing what he wants *and* making them think it was their idea all along. He would have made a good con artist. A week ago you were avoiding him and now you’re inviting him into your bed and making plans for a date. What changed?”
Jack blew out a breath and leaned back in the chair. “You think he’s manipulating me?”
“I didn’t say that. I’m just wondering why the sudden change of heart.”
Jack studied the floor for a minute before answering. “Because I’m tired of fighting,” he finally said. “I’ve been finding excuses not to date for years. I’m too busy. I can’t find the right woman. I have to take care of my son. But since I met Ford, I can’t stop thinking about him. I can’t stop *dreaming* about him. I know the dreams aren’t always good, but...it’s like I’m being *drawn* to him. Like we’re *supposed* to be together. Does that make sense?”
Miles just stared at him, his expression blank. “Are you gay?”
“No,” Jack answered instinctively. Then he flinched. “Yes...I don’t know.”
Miles waved his hand dismissively. “Never mind. Scratch that. Are you attracted to Jim?”
This answer Jack was confident about. “Yes.”
“But you don’t trust him. Is that why you’re here talking to me?”
Jack shifted a little in his seat. “Something like that.”
“You want me to vouch for his character.”
Jack stilled. “Yes.”
Miles nodded and tried to sit up a little, push himself up the mattress. He gave up quickly when the efforts made his back twinge painfully.
Jack caught his wince and sat up straighter. “Do you need help?”
Miles waved his hand again. “No, I’m fine. Just getting a little stir crazy I guess.” He leveled his gaze at Jack. “Let me tell you something about Jim. He can be a real asshole sometimes. Drive you absolutely fucking insane until you just want to punch him in the face. But I wouldn’t trust anyone else to have my back. In fact, I probably wouldn’t be here recovering from a gunshot wound if he hadn’t been busy reading the suspect his rights when that other guy got the drop on me.”
“Okay.” Jack frowned, not quite sure how to take that.
“He reminds me of a dog my uncle used to have when I was a kid. We always had to be careful when he was around strangers because he would growl and sometimes try to bite them. One day I realized he only did it *because* they were strangers. Once he got to know them – once they *earned* his trust – he was the same big marshmallow he was around my family. It was his way of protecting us.”
“So I’m the stranger?”
“No. You *were*. See, Ford tends to keep people at arm’s length. And he usually does that by acting like an ass and pissing them off enough that they don’t want to get any closer. But if he trusts you, he can be the most loyal friend you could ever have. He already trusts you. I’m not sure what that makes you, but I know Ford. If he’s taking care of your son and bringing you coffee just for the hell of it and climbing into bed with you *just* to sleep, you are well past earning his trust.”
Jack leaned back in the chair, rubbing at the day’s growth of stubble on his chin. “So what should I do?”
“What are you asking me for? It’s none of my business.”
“I mean...what am I getting myself into here?”
Miles leveled him with an incredulous stare. “Do you always overthink things like this?”
Jack frowned.
“Look, if you don’t want to come out of the closet, that’s fine, but it sounds like you’re at least curious. What’s the worst that could happen?” His face slackened, humor fading with realization as Jack practically flinched at that and stared at the floor. “If you’re afraid Jim will do something to hurt you or humiliate you or something; don’t be. Even if it doesn’t work out between you, he’s not the kind of guy who would sabotage you out of spite. In fact, if somebody else did something to hurt you he would make it his personal mission to track them down and make them pay for it. He can be very...vigilante.”
Jack still looked unconvinced.
“Y’know, someone once told me that all relationships involve some sort of risk – at least in the beginning. You can’t avoid it. And you can’t go through life worrying about what *might* happen. So the question here isn’t whether or not you *should* - the question is: what do you *want*? If you’re not ready, you’re not ready. But if you are, you just need to stop overanalyzing everything and go for it. Call it a leap of faith.”
Jack thought about that for a minute. Was he overthinking it all – worrying unnecessarily? Juliet had complained more than once about his tendency to get “too intense” about certain aspects of his life.
‘Let it go, Jack,’ he heard his father’s voice whisper in his head.
He opened his mouth, not entirely sure what he wanted to say, but was interrupted when the door to the room opened.
“Excuse me, I didn’t realize you had a follow up today,” the surprised physical therapist said, beginning to retreat back into the hallway. “I can come back later.”
“No, it’s okay. We were just finishing up.” Jack stood, quickly falling back into professional mode. “I’ll see you again next week, Mr. Straume?”
Miles gave him an odd look, but followed his lead easily. “Yeah, sure. Thanks, Dr. Shephard.”
Jack smiled and nodded, slipping past the therapist. “He’s all yours, Doctor.”
TBC